Poll: Holiday specials for grinches

I love holiday flicks. As a kid, I eagerly awaited recurring specials such as Santa Claus is Coming to Town, White Christmas, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and Will Vinton’s Claymation Christmas. As an adult, I continued to collect their VHS and DVD versions. Like Community’s Abed, I mentally catalogued and loved all of their candy cane tropes. But, I know their saccharine sweetness can grate the heart of the most disaffected 90s hipster.

So, what contemporary holiday specials would you recommend if your friend’s a grinch, a too-cool-for-school Jeff Winger, an ironic skinny jeans-wearing hipster, a retro-90s anti-establishment Britta-type character, a non-post-modern Scrooge, or just a kid who refuses to admit he believes in Santa Claus? What shows or special TV events would you use to melt their too tiny hearts?

After debating the issue, we, at CliqueClack, came up with a list. Ironically, while discussing specials we loved, we discovered holiday events that we hate like The Charlie Brown Christmas Special; Polar Express; and A Christmas Story (but that’s for next week’s poll).

So, if you hate all Christmas specials, say “Bah Humbug” to carolers or are just a cool, hip cat, what do you think of our holiday suggestions?

An: This is slightly inspired by Deb, but what holiday show would you recommend to melt the heart of the biggest or most disaffected grinch?

Katie: This might be a controversial choice, but Mystery Science Theatre 3000’s Santa Claus Conquers the Martians because it will laugh their Scrooginess away! Plus, “Patrick Swayze Christmas” is the most heartwarming Christmas song about Patrick Swayze ever.

Deb: I am sooooo not a Christmas special grinch — in fact, I love The Grinch! And It’s a Wonderful Life! And Miracle on 34th St … I will admit that re-watching Rudolph as an adult is somewhat disturbing, but I even liked the Phinneas and Ferb Christmas special! I just can’t stand that bald kid in the yellow shirt….

An: Can anyone else recommend other Christmas Grinch-melting specials likes The Polar Express, Robbie the Reindeer,  Community Christmas or Nightmare Before Christmas?

Kona: God, I fucking hate Polar Express. I made the mistake of showing that to my son last Christmas when it aired on ABC Family. He became obsessed with it, and I wanted to kill myself. Beyond the creepy characters (the hobo on top of the train! WTF?) and the dead-eyed stares, the biggest sin of that movie is that it’s BORING. It is so mind-numbingly, horrifyingly dull that I would literally rather watch an  instructional video about how trains work than have to sit through that piece of shit movie again. FUCK.

Ivey: I’ve yet to meet a Christmas TV special that actually puts me in the appropriate holiday mood. The only ones that come close are Rudolph and Charlie Brown, but those are iconic unto themselves, and I could hypothetically get excited to see them for the sake of seeing them, not because it would necessarily be evocative some specific Grinch-style-heart-meltiness.

Oh, and there’s only one Reindeer special worth talking about. Robbie? Please.

Deb: HA! Yes, that movie was so boring and creepy, I can’t even believe it was rated ‘G’. However, the original Chris Van Allsburg book is so close to perfect that it might even make me like that little yellow-shirted bald kid.

Bob: For me it pretty much begins and ends with How the Grinch Stole Christmas. One part Seuss, one part Chuck Jones, and one part Boris Karloff — a formula not to be duplicated.

If we’re throwing movies into the mix, though, I do have a soft spot for Scrooged. What’s not to love about seeing Bill Murray get smacked in the face with a toaster by Carol Kane?

Deb: Ditto to both of those. We actually caught a bit of Scrooged last weekend I think … so fun to see it again. But wait — what did I respond with earlier? If I said Miracle on 34th Street and It’s a Wonderful Life, I was right.

Chuck: Love Scrooged!  So glad it’s finally on Blu-ray!

An: Wow. I’ve never seen Kona so irate. While the CGI/film comes across as creepy, its melancholic tone reminded me of The Snowman which I loved –

Chuck: Nightmare Before Christmas isn’t really a Christmas special.  It’s a theatrical feature, and if you want to include that you’re opening up a whole slew of things … for the Flicks page!  Scrooged, the 1951 Christmas Carol, Muppets Christmas Carol, It’s a Wonderful Life, etc.

An: There are some films that have become recursive television events like Nightmare Before Christmas or traditional family-around-the-television events like White Christmas and It’s a Wonderful Life. So, I feel they’re fair game.

Carla: If we are including feature films, I love it when I catch Miracle on 34th Street on. The original and the remake!

Katie: I have to include Batman: the Animated Series‘ “Christmas with the Joker” with Mark Hamill’s Joker. It’s a really entertaining episode, made even better by the fact that the Joker sings the version of Jingle Bells with the Joker getting away.

I guess Batman learns a lesson about Christmas cheer, but you’re really watching it for Joker singing and blowing crap up.

Tara: If Flicks does a holiday movie poll, I would definitely spew and rant about White Christmas. In a good way, I mean. I’m crazy for that movie.

Kona: I don’t really watch Christmas specials, but 24 hours of A Christmas Story on TBS is a holiday tradition in my house, as is Elf, which I believe is shown on ABC Family.

Bob: Elf is fantastic! A Christmas Story, on the other hand, is another time honored holiday special that Deb and I don’t understand.

Rachel: I live in Cleveland, have been to the Christmas Story house/museum, have seen that fishnet stocking lamp in every bar on town, and STILL don’t really like the movie.

My guilty pleasure Christmas movie is Love Actually. I stop whatever I’m doing to watch it whenever it’s on tv.

Deb: Yes, Elf is one of the only “new” Christmas movies I like, very cute. Glad to know it’s not just a Degon gene defect that causes a disconnect with A Christmas Story!

You can vote ONCE a day. The poll closes on Wednesday, December 14th at Midnight ET.