[Spoiler alert] My esteemed colleague Deb McDuffee buys that Chase really killed Dibala, (the mass murdering f*ck played by the always-marvelous James Earl Jones) on House this week. Oh no no no. It was Cameron. And this is how they are going to get rid of Jennifer Morrison.

It makes perfect sense: Cameron was told (by Dibala) to make a choice, that she doesn’t have the courage of her convictions, so she decided that he was going to die.

But even if I didn’t know that Morrison was leaving the show, I would think it was Cameron rather than Chase. She has killed before.

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Well, that title should get some Google hits now, shouldn’t it? Seriously, if you put all these plots together it would sound like a female exploitation film from the early ’70s. Which would probably be better viewing than these Tuesday night repeats.

• Tonight’s episode of House is the one that begins with a girl-on-girl scene between Thirteen and a one night stand who eventually falls ill. This was during her “I’m going to die, so I don’t give a s*!t’ phase of her life. After that is a new episode of House … er, I mean Mental.
• On NBC there are two episodes of Law & Order:SVU. In the first, a dead body leads to three more dead bodies and a strip club. In other words, a standard episode; except for the fact that it guest-stars Carol Burnett. In the next hour, Detective Benson has flashbacks to her sexual assualt during a routine investigation.
• On CBS it’s the Crimetime lineup of NCIS, The Mentalist (the episode with the bomb timer), and 48 Hours Mystery. 48 Hours may be the best option as it investigates the death of a preacher’s wife.
• No repeats on ABC — NBA Finals. Time to reminisce of past schedules. For example, the Tuesday night schedule for 1999 gave us Home Improvement, Spin City, Sports Night, and the great NYPD Blue. Ah, good times!

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Despite all of the pain, suffering, and various bodily fluids that are displayed each week on House it’s generally a brightly lit show. There’s always plenty of natural light streaming through the hospital’s windows and the rooms and corridors tend to be light and airy. Even when a patient looks to be at death’s doorstep there is an unusual illumination to their surroundings that make the viewer feel that everything will be just fine.

There wasn’t much of that in this week’s pivotal episode. In fact, save for a few scenes prior to Kutner’s death (sorry, it’s no longer a spoiler), much of Princeton-Plainsboro was shrouded in darkness; a darkness that followed the other characters as they tried to deal with the suicide of their co-worker.

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One of the best things about the beginning of House, season five, was that cool private investigator that House hired to do his dirty work. I’ve been loving the last few episodes of House, so I didn’t realize that I missed him until it suddenly dawned on me out of the blue: Michael Weston, where’d you go?

More accurately, Lucas Douglas, played by Michael Weston (not to be confused with Jeffrey Donovan’s character on Burn Notice, Michael Westen; follow along …) – where are you? You are missed! From the moment we met the P.I., posing as a toaster oven repairman in the doctor’s lounge in episode two, “Not Cancer,” he had a fun and unique personality.

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(Season 5, Episode 9 – “Last Resort”)

What did I think about the fancy opening of the week? I still love the experimenting they are doing, and the slow motion pan of the hospital clinic was a nice touch. We knew right away we were going to get something very different this week, since the cold open never takes place in the hospital.

I think the theme of the week was neat and tidy, with some very tight writing, the way I like it. But, I bet that it was more subtle for those of you who’ve been getting hit over the head with it. Am I right?

I think the “last resort” refers obviously to Gun Guy (I’m almost sure his name was Jason but I can’t find it anywhere online to confirm it and I think we were purposely supposed to think of him as “Gun Guy”) and Thirteen, but even House, too; but we’ll get to that.

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FOX

(Season 5, Episode 6)

The cold open sucked me in right away. I’ve noticed this season that House is trying something different with their opens, and this one was unlike anything we’ve seen before. The recurring blackouts of the consumer product tester are dreamlike in his stark surroundings. Weird, David-Lynch-like vibes from this scene; very cool.

But what else did this episode have to offer us? Joy, or better explained, the lack thereof. The title was such a huge irony, and the way we finally got some joy at the end with the patient and his daughter probably wasn’t the joy you were looking for, if you want to see some happiness from the main cast, like I do.

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