To the bean counters and pole sitters over at ABC:

You’re toying with my emotions. Here I am in a fragile enough state, what with the economy plunging down the water slide of recession. Now I’m hearing news that one of the banes of my existence, one of the thorns in my side, one of my pet peeves may soon be coming to an end.

What I’m hearing is According to Jim, otherwise known as The Show That Will Never Die, could be ending its eight-year run this May after several weeks of double-episode runs that will replace Homeland Security, U.S.A. Many industry folk are saying once the last dozen or so episodes begin airing in late March it will be the end of the line for Jim and his family’s first run life (though they will continue until the end of time in syndication).

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Seriously. That was the most entertaining installment of American Idol I think I have ever seen. I wrote that last week had some great performances, but the wild card show blows that out of the water. Just about every single performance made me either smile, or outright laugh.

Tell people they’re out of the competition, then bring them back for one last shot, and everyone brings their A-game. Combine that with a super-fast-paced format with almost no filler, and that, my friends, is an entertaining show. And to think, I almost didn’t watch. Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Simon, Paula, Randy and Kara,

Apparently your producers value weirdness more than talent. I say producers because I can’t possibly believe that you are responsible for three people making the top 36 that just plain shouldn’t be there.

First, Norman Gentle, or whatever his real name is. I swear, they had to have put your laughter in after the fact, because you couldn’t have really been laughing at his performances. Perhaps at him, but not his shtick. He’s not funny, and his voice isn’t good enough to make it to the top 36. I can only believe that he is there for the personality factor, or should I say spectacle factor. There are lots of unique personalities behind the actual singers, if you actually give them the spotlight once in a while.

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Admit it, you watched last night. For those who  have been hiding in your cellar for the past few weeks, FOX’s mega-hit American Idol premiered season eight (!) last night. Seemingly shoving all the shows on Fox’s regular schedule aside to an “EXCITING NEW NIGHT!”

This year’s go ’round, coming to us from lovely Arizona, featured all the usual elements we’ve come to expect from these Idol audition episodes; It was way too long, we got to see dozens of shots of the teeming masses of hopefuls screaming, shots of the judges arriving, lots of crazies (not including Paula Abdul), Simon being mean, tears, screams, and all the rest.
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You know it and I know it: American Idol premiered last night. Did I watch it? I admit, out of curiosity, I did turn it on for about 15 minutes or so while waiting for The Mentalist to start. Did I enjoy it? Well, no.

While I wanted to catch a glimpse of the new judge and how she affected the dynamics of the team (still not sure on that one), I just loathe the auditions. It makes me sad that the somewhat odd people of the world set themselves up to be exploited by TPTB of American Idol, the judges and, ultimately, the viewers.

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Seriously people: Season eight? ABC makes the inexplicable decision to pull three quality shows from its lineup — Pushing Daisies, Dirty Sexy Money and Eli Stone — and decides instead to air double episodes of According to Jim all winter long?

As if there aren’t enough reasons not to watch According to Jim, you could simply forgo just to rebel against ABC and their crappy decisions regarding their lineup. But if you need something else to do so that you don’t watch, try these on for size.

1. Flea-dip your dog.
2. Re-watch your Cop Rock season one DVD.
3. Replay the Rosie Live recording that you just can’t get off your DVR.
4. Begin your presidential campaign.
5. Combine various cleaning products into one bucket just to see what happens.
6. Have a staring contest with an inanimate object.

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