Reality Clack – Don’t Hammertime on Gene Simmons Family Jewels!
Anyone know what time it is? Why, it’s Hammertime — time to revisit big pants and popping definitely many steps below the talent of Phillip Chbeeb on So You Think You Can Dance. Okay, I’ll confess that when I think of MC Hammer, I might just take to humming “You Can’t Touch This” and boppin’ my head a bit. In his heyday, I found him entertaining. But will I remain entertained watching a show all about his family life? It’s getting so that almost every has been, washed-up, or just need-a-PR-jolt celebrity is getting into the reality genre. Some can be entertaining, others not so much.
On the other hand, I was never either a Gene Simmons nor KISS fan. Yet that Hammer better not go near those Family Jewels. I’ve grown quite addicted to that one. Yeah, it could be that cougar crush thing with Nick, but it’s my TV. I can watch what I want!
The Cougar – Can hunky love be divided 20 different ways?
The answer to the question above is a resounding “No. It cannot.” But it’s going to be fun trying! How ‘bout we delve into some prime quotations over the course of the first three episodes and see what we can see?
The Premise: Stacey Anderson, a successful 40-ish something in real estate, previously married and looking for love. Love of the younger, hunky sort. Quoth The Cougar: “I’m at the point in my life right now where I’m comfortable in my own skin. I know who I am and I find younger guys are the ones that are able to keep up with me. I think they’re less intimidated by my success and independence.”
Hooooooooooo-boy. Here we go. Already we have an inkling of what’s to come. And from the quip above, we know one thing right off the bat: It’s going to be jam-packed with all sorts of nifty snippets — some wonderful, some downright groan-inducing.
TV Shows Off the Beaten Path – True Beauty
Yes, it’s another (fairly) new reality show. No fear for the anti-reality folks, though. With the premise of True Beauty, such as it is, chances are it’s only good for a season. You see, the contestants have only been told that they’re basically entering a beauty contest with challenges which eliminate a contestant each week. The winner wins a quarter-million dollars and will be included in People Magazine in a special issue featuring all those oh-so-beautiful folks. But in reality, they’re not judged just on the cover. Now, I’m not seeing much “cover” beauty for these two guys, but maybe it’s just me.
Reality Clack – American Idol, The Bachelor, The Biggest Loser, Superstars of Dance
Ah, we’re finally into new seasons of reality shows! Well, the reality biggie American Idol doesn’t start until this week, but the madness is already here. As always, I contend that American Idol is more of a talent contest (or non-talent with some of the contestants) than what I’d refer to as a reality show. However, I’m overruled by the masses. It falls under the reality umbrella.
The Bachelor had its premiere last week with single father Jason Mesnick and a slew of women looking for love in all the wrong places. Okay, just one wrong place. I know the show has its fans, but I just could never get by the concept that they think they’re just going to love whatever bachelor is on for the season. Nothing against Jason, but it’s all about being on television if you ask me. That’s not love. That’s “I want to be a TV star!”
Reality Clack – Top Chef, Survivor, Big Brother 11, Amazing Race
I have to ask you … are you insane? If you are, head on over to the Big Brother 11 application and try to get your foot in the door. Now, be honest when you answer the questions about your relationship with your mother and the last time you’ve punched, kicked, hit, or threw something in anger.
If you’re into defenestration of your foes, let them know. I like to use the word “defenestration” and just don’t get the chance to do so very often. But, if you practice the art of defenestration, BB11 may be just the place for you! What would you do if Big Brother made you famous? Me? I’d hide under a rock never to emerge into society again. Neither the application nor the eligibility requirements list the season’s starting date, but I’m thinking there will be no winter edition of the show if they’re just putting the casting into full swing now. Of course, if the actors go out on strike, a winter edition could possibly happen. I guess we’ll wait and see.
TV Shows Off the Beaten Path – Little People, Big World
I’ll admit that I’m not a loyal fan of Little People, Big World on TLC. After all, its regular time slot is up against The Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother. However, one of the great things about many of the cable stations, including TLC, is that they re-air the shows at various hours and sometimes even show mini-marathons. That’s how I originally came across the series. I recall it was a rainy Sunday afternoon and I was channel surfing. I hit a marathon of LP, BP and that was that. Now if it’s on at an odd hour and I don’t have a “must watch” show, I catch it.
Reality Clack – Dancing With the Stars, Top Chef, Survivor, America’s Next Top Model
ABC
Whoa, time does fly for the fall seasons of reality shows, doesn’t it? Dancing With the Stars is almost to the finale stage as is The Amazing Race. The finale went down this week for America’s Next Top Model. Sure, Top Chef is just getting its start. But we’re soon going to be lacking our reality fixes until the winter season kicks off in January and February.
Alas, that also means that American Idol will once again take over the world as we know it. I saw David Archuleta on The Bonnie Hunt Show earlier this week. Yes, he’s talented and a cute kid. But my gosh … the hoopla all over again is a scary thought.
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