Gossip Girl – Hookers
I love how everyone on Gossip Girl tonight was basically dealing in human trafficking: either they were selling themselves, or selling out everyone else. Although, I guess that could pretty much be said for every episode of Gossip Girl– they just spelled it out for us this time.
Today is election day all over this great land of ours, so this episode is especially timely. Gossip Girl can hardly be accused of realism, but I really enjoyed what they did with the election storyline. America loves a good hero, and it seems as though New York, especially, has a local hero about every week.
But enough about heroes. Let’s talk about hookers– and how Serena is totally a big one.
See Jane Clack: Who’s the bigger douchebag – Dave Letterman or Jon Gosselin?
Like many TV viewers, I’ve been awash in David Letterman and Jon Gosselin news and gossip for the past week or so. Basically, I think they’re both douchebags. When it comes to Dave, I mean that in the kindest way.
I really like Dave. I appreciate a lot of things he’s done over the years, from bringing his heart surgeon on the show to featuring his mom in various bits. I love it when she says “David” in that mom way, and he knows that viewers like me love that stuff.
Why Craig Ferguson is the best talk show host there is – Guest Clack
Sebastian’s back Guest-clacking for us again….
If you follow my guest-clacks here over the last month, you’ve most likely already discovered that I’m a sucker for all things “real.” I love shows that feel right, things that fit, stories that could happen. I like to laugh because it makes me feel warm and cuddly inside. I like to feel for the people on screen. I love stories that could happen.
The reason why Craig Ferguson is the best talk show host there is is simple. He’s real. He’s so unlike all the other guys with a desk and a chair and a sofa.
For starters, his show doesn’t have the regular opening monologue. When he started to do his show back in January 2005, they tried to make him read cue cards, let him make jokes his writers came up with and try to be funny. Which failed miserably. Every now and then, he has guests return that he had on his show in that abysmal first week — and they remember with him how bad that was.
Quotation Marks – Dwight Schrute, Edie Britt, and Dr. House
(Week of Dec. 13, 2008)
“I may be a ho, but I’m not a crack ho.” – Cops
“Falalalala-lala-ka-ching.” – Dwight, on his his plan to buy all the unicorn dolls from local stores and sell them to desperate parents at a huge profit, The Office
Desperate Housewives:
“You are my rock Lynette.” – Tom
“Tom, your rock is trying to get fingerprints off a weapon, do you mind?” – Lynette
“Two of my friends involved in a nasty catfight? I live for that stuff!” – Edie
The plucked peacock
This may seem like piling-on after yesterday’s brilliant Grinch/Zucker ditty by CliqueClack’s own Richard Keller, but what the hell happened to NBC? The once imposing network — home to such television icons as the Cartwrights and Johnny Carson — has plummeted into a chasm of mediocrity. A perennial ratings powerhouse during the ’80s and ’90s, the 21st century has seen NBC flounder like week-old sea bass at the bottom of the Nielsen Media Research barrel.
Allow me a moment’s diversion: Has anyone ever met a man, woman or child who belonged to the elusive “Nielsen Family?” I’m aware these chosen few are sworn to secrecy — under threat of execution by firing squad — never to divulge their Nielsen status, but I smell an American Idol-sized rat. I am convinced this so-called Nielsen is actually an introverted genius with Coke-bottle-thick glasses and severe hyperhidrosis, who works out of a windowless room feeding advanced algorithms into a holographic supercomputer. But that’s just my warped opinion. I could be wrong.
Anyway, among the big four networks, NBC consistently places third or fourth in the weekly ratings race. Is this a prolonged slump or has the peacock lost its broadcasting mojo?
TV Shows Off the Beaten Path: The Late Show with David Letterman
CBS
What? David Letterman off the beaten path? Sure, he’s a mainstream entertainment kind of guy. Yes, folks have talked about his show for decades. But my criteria for being considered off the beaten path has more to do with what blogs review on a regular basis. I’m sure somewhere in the world someone probably reviews The Late Show with David Letterman nightly. But I don’t know where they are. So here he is for your latest Off the Beaten Path perusal.
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