I don’t know about you, but I totally related to Modern Family’s story lines tonight. OK, maybe not the baby killer one (we only had an acquaintance threaten to feed little Owen to the lions — not a good friend), but the other two? Oh yes.

I have fond yet annoying memories of my male friends coming over in my high school and home-for-the-holiday college years and not making it out of my father’s Mantown basement lair. You know I’m talking to you, Vinnie and Steffan — you came to pick me up and take me to a party, yet you spent all night playing pool, darts and computer games. This, my post-reading friends, happened on more than one occasion.

The anniversary gift fiasco, I must say, did strike a chord with me as well. You know, it’s their fault — if they would just cash in the coupons, they’d be a really good gift. Men. I’m off to shine my sapphire ring now. I know Keith is about to cash in that coupon for a free back massage anytime, but man, it’s like waiting for a slap bet.

Any teenager of the ’80s can relate to Spandau Ballet and the perfect lameness that was portrayed in tonight’s episode of Modern Family. Ed Norton, you rock, and I definitely don’t mean literally.

Back to the baby killer a moment … even though it may not be to the extreme, us couples with-child all have friends without, and it does make it harder to stay the same type of friends that you were. Um, sorry, we can go to dinner at 5:30 but we’ve got to be home by 8:00 latest to put Owen to bed, since he won’t fall asleep for anyone but us.

Now either you’re all pooling your collective funds to get me — or Owen — some really good therapy, or you’re laughing right along with me at Modern Family’s superb episode tonight. Which story line hit home for you the most?

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Who doesn’t love a good, old-fashioned showdown? Today we pit Private Practice against Grey’s Anatomy in an epic Battle of the Medical Soap Operas Sprung from Shonda Rhimes’ Dark and Twisty Mind. I’ll compare three aspects of the shows. Your votes will decide which one is better.

Cast of characters. Both Private Practice and Grey’s Anatomy feature some strong characters. Practice has Addison (who was one of the most interesting characters on Grey’s), Pete and Violet (both so dark and twisty, their baby will probably be the darkest and twistiest person alive), and Charlotte, who is now my favorite character after starting out as the mean Southern lady who refuses to give surgeries to dying babies and puppies.

For me, the standout Grey’s characters have always been Bailey, Christina, Callie, and Alex (I also love to look at McDreamy and McSteamy). The show keeps adding great new pieces like Owen Hunt (the awesome Kevin McKidd) and Teddy Altman (Kim Raver of 24 and Lipstick Jungle). Seattle Grace’s merger with Mercy West has brought a lot of new faces to the show as well.

While both shows feature ensemble casts, Grey’s clearly has many more characters, which means less screen time all around. With its smaller core of characters, Practice theoretically can focus more on character development; however, the patients take up a lot of the focus. Practice differs from Grey’s in that the patients are recurring characters (like the two moms whose embryos got switched … whoops). This creates continuity and allows us to get to know them better. Unfortunately, a lot of the patients are idiots, so I haven’t exactly warmed up to them.

Story lines. Grey’s has the crazy Merry-Go-Round of Love thing going on. Nearly everyone has hooked up with everyone else, and just when you think a couple has finally got it together, they ruin their relationship and move on to a new partner. I hope Izzie and Alex will buck the trend, but in the latest episode there are hints of something starting between Izzie and the Mercy West guy, Charles Percy.

I wish Izzie could have heard the speech delivered by Charlotte last night on Practice (she basically told her patient, “Your relationship is not always going to be a fairytale; don’t run when things get hard”). That episode also reminded me that Practice does the same relationship-hopping thing but on a smaller scale. The characters shuffle partners to the point of ridiculousness. Last night, when Sam and Addison kissed, it was George and Izzie all over again. One of the things I love about Practice is the now steady relationship between Cooper and Charlotte. That’s something that I want for Alex and Izzie.

Besides the Merry-Go-Round of Love, medical things also take place on these shows (gasp!). On Practice, the medical stories tend to lead, while the relationships provide the B-stories. Practice can be pretty heavy-handed when it comes to using bizarre medical cases as opportunities to moralize via an ethical dilemma of the week. The patient stories on Grey’s are usually funny or tragic, not quite as preachy, and they reflect (rather conveniently) whatever is going on in the lives of the residents.

Writing. Let me say a few words about the dialogue, because that is something Shonda Rhimes’ shows are known for. There is something in the water at Seattle Grace that causes everyone — doctors, nurses, patients, and visitors alike — to speak in long, eloquent monologues. While these speeches can be deeply moving, I look for the part at the end where the person starts repeating the same phrase over and over again. The style carries over to Practice; last night, it was Addison, weeping, “Get me out of this car. Get me out of this car! Get me out. Get me out of this car! GET ME OUT OF THIS CAR. Get me out ….” (I wonder when the director let her stop.) That said, Practice does a better job of making the dialogue feel natural. Perhaps the older, more experienced cast knows how to deliver the lines so that each character’s unique voice is maintained. The writing on Grey’s is certainly more eloquent as a whole, but when the characters on Grey’s begin to speechify, they can start to sound the same.

Both shows have strengths and weaknesses, but these depend on your perception and preferences (i.e., Do you like an emphasis on relationships or on medical dilemmas? Do you prefer eloquent or natural dialogue?).

I have barely put a dent in this topic, and all of the observations I’ve made are colored by my personal opinions. That’s why I’m not going to decide the winner of this showdown. You are.

Leave your comments, cast your votes, and may the better show prevail.

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The real estate market is a fickle beast, so when you get lucky enough to find and fall in love with something that’s already been built, you pounce on it. In fact, it’s such an unlikely scenario that you should realize just how lucky you are. So why is it that one insignificant little thing will always tank the deal?

I’m not saying that the clogged toilet off of Marcy and Charlie’s master bedroom was a pretty sight, but to be the breaking point for a couple who’d been back repeatedly to check out what was clearly their dream house too? We accept mates with more flaws than we allow our properties to have. Also, the couple’s not being turned off might have forestalled the Runkles from reuniting, so it would have been good for them and for us. Stupid erratic consumers.

This was another strong episode. Funny, interesting, and I love both Jill (Diane Farr) and Felicia (Embeth Davidtz). The characters are strong, the actresses are talented, both play great opposite Hank, and I really like all the potential for both romance and love triangle drama that lies with each of them. It’ll be a little creepy if Felicia starts helping out with Becca for real — Hank and Felicia hanging out with their daughters while she cheats on her husband with Hank? I mean, he’s done worse many times before, but talk about awkward….

What I don’t understand is Jackie (Eva Amurri). Yes, she’s a student, a stripper, whatever. That’s actually beside the point for me. I just don’t like her, I don’t think she adds anything, and I honestly don’t find her particularly attractive. In fact, I’m having a hard time finding any plausible reason whatsoever as to why Hank would be interested in her, other than the fact that he wants all women. But is that enough of a reason when he’s juggling two others and a third in New York?

I did really enjoy the scene at the end of the episode where all three took their seats in his classroom; admittedly, it wouldn’t have had the same effect if there were only two (I also thought that all three would put their legs up on their desks and be, well, feeling a breeze). But otherwise I wish Jackie would get dropped. I’m not interested — though I realize that their relationship may have more consequences than the one with Felicia — and I’m concerned that she will steal focus from the Jill and Felicia plots.

I won’t lie and say that Jackie’s scenes didn’t detract from my enjoyment of the episode, but beyond her screen time I found this fourth episode to be living up to its predecessors. Californication really is one of the finest shows on television today. I know it would never get the creative freedom it enjoys were it not on a network like Showtime, but it’s a shame that that results in a limited audience.

Could Californication make the leap to mass audiences like Dexter and The Sopranos before it? I actually think the depravity may be more extreme when it comes to Hank, but you never know. With a show as great as this, it certainly might be worth a try.

Anyway, what do you think about Hank’s current love life?

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Surprisingly, no SNL Digital Shorts tonight. Here’s some quick thoughts on each of the sketches of the night. Videos and thoughts embedded below.

Cold Open: The Rock Obama — Oh look, another president sketch. Actually, when the real joke of the sketch was revealed with the Rock cameo, it was pretty funny. When Biden entered, though, it started to fall apart and get a bit awkward.

Monologue: Gerard Butler — Given that he’s mostly known for the two things he made fun of during his monologue, Butler did a decent job with the material at hand. I thought for sure Sean Connery had hosted a few times before, making him the record holder of most guest spots from a Scotsman.

Commercial: Fuquay Satin’s Grand Hoochie Skank Rose Champagne — For pouring down the cracks of ladies’ asses. Use no other champagne for the very best of that crack-tacular taste. This was an OK commercial; no great shakes though.

Game Time with Randy and Greg — This turned out to be pretty hilarious when Butler grabbed Greg the alien’s tail. I definitely burst out laughing at Bill Hader’s screaming. They did hit a note with a lot of these sports talk shows, though, where you’ve got the serious dude sitting their with the sidekick that everyone’s really watching for.

Beauty and the Beast — This sketch was surprisingly not so bad. When I saw they were doing Beauty and the Beast, I groaned, but they were able to make something pretty funny from it. “How does she know we call it an ass castle?”

Musical Guest: Shakira — Was it just me or did that first outfit have a weird design to it that made her appear pregnant or fat? Oh, and the drummer looked like he was sitting behind a fancy Rock Band drum set. Anyway, her music’s not my thing but it sounded OK. She just seems think she looks a lot hotter than she is these days.

Weekend Update — What can I say? It’s consistently one of, if not the best part of the show. Loved how they mocked the balloon boy non-news. If you saw the whole sketch, you’ll know the best quote: “Well, thank you for coming.”

300: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell — Wow, the skits tonight actually don’t completely suck! This was another one that turned out pretty funny and didn’t run on too long. I think everyone’s made fun of how gay the movie 300 appears, so having Butler participate in its smack-down was especially great.

What Up With That? — This season seems to be all about throwing on the random guest star cameos, this time it was with James Franco … who said and did nothing. Best part of this sketch was all of the bizarre background guests, especially whatever Jason Sudeikis was supposed to be with his frantic dancing.

Trina the Assistant — This is right up there with Gilly. Sorry, I mean down there, because I mean it’s annoying as hell and just plain sucks. This needs to go in the big pile of fail right away. At least there’s no Trina theme song … yet.

Daveheart — A sorta funny idea that could have been better, but for the last sketch of the night, what do you expect? It’s moments like this, though, when I miss the old “Everything Scottish” sketch from days of yore. “If it’s nah Scottish, IT’S CRAP!”

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Santuary’s on Syfy tonight, and frequent reader of CliqueClack, Ruby T., is Guest Clacking today with a few reasons why you should be tuning in to the show. Ruby is a writer from Chicago and a science-fiction/fantasy aficionado (all right, a geek).

1) It’s derivative, but in a fun way. I always enjoy spotting a nice sci-fi homage (or rip-off, if you prefer). Sanctuary as a whole is a kind of mash-up of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and X-Men, with the ageless Helen Magnus as a Mina Harker/Prof. X character. But it gets better. I don’t even have to know the actual names of the episodes anymore. It’s just “that Tribbles episode” or “the Fight Club episode” or “the Cloverfield episode.” Tell me, what self-respecting geek would not be intrigued by this? (Okay, if you want to look up those episodes, their real titles are “Nubbins,” “Warriors,” and “Instinct.”) On a side note, you can also play “Spot-the-Syfy-Star” with Sanctuary’s guest roster featuring names like Rekha Sharma of Battlestar Galactica and Michael Shanks of Stargate.

2) The cast is getting hotter. Over the course of the first season, nerdy Will lost his glasses and got a girlfriend who can turn invisible (when she takes all her clothes off; they don’t turn invisible with her). Ashley Magnus appears to be moving away from the stupid blunt bangs (the ones that made her look so infantile that I would laugh at the screen whenever she took down the bad guys, “Haha! Helen Magnus’s toddler just wupped your ass!”).

And to complete the addition by subtraction: I expect, based on the season two premiere, that “Bigfoot” the Neanderthal may die. His demise would add an instant ten points to the Sanctuary cast’s hotness factor.

The other hot addition, besides Will’s invisible girlfriend, is Nikola Tesla (played by Jonathan Young); let’s face it, anyone who can turn into a vampire at will is hot. Even good old Henry is looking good now that we know he’s a werewolf like Jacob Black.

3) Season two is off to a good start. I won’t spoil it for you (I mean, besides the “Bigfoot is dying” part). The premiere is available on Syfy.com, and it looks like Helen Magnus, Jack the Ripper, and company are in for a little surprise from Miss Ashley. New episodes air each Friday on Syfy and are available online the following day.

Are you revisiting Sanctuary this season? Sound off in the comments.

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Last week I went on about how I think Dollhouse should be shown the door. Dollhouse fans have their petitions at the ready, and their Twitter avatars changed, in support of the show. Then you’ve got people like me who say the show deserves to be canceled, thinking, “what the hell is FOX thinking, keeping such a low-rated show on the air?” Yet, on the air Dollhouse remains. In fact, FOX has just stated that it will air the full 13 episodes it ordered for the season, despite how awful the ratings have been.

People not digging this season of Dollhouse probably think FOX is out of its mind for allowing it to stay on. Hell, I even think it’s weird. Though I continue to think Dollhouse deserves the ratings it’s getting, I commend FOX for keeping the show on for the fans.

In a way I feel bad for FOX. No, really, I know it sounds like complete lunacy, but I do!

FOX is known for axing cult favorite shows, and the ratings have shown that, from a business standpoint, they did the right thing. Firefly: gone. Terminator: gone. Oh, I know there are more, but those are some of the recent biggies.

Now FOX is actually doing the unthinkable: they’re throwing the fans a bone. Standing by Dollhouse not once (with picking it up for a second season in the first place), but twice, is remarkable. The thing is, people aren’t going to remember that FOX gave the ailing Dollhouse a chance by allowing it to show all 13 episodes; they’re going to remember that FOX canceled it. There will be no blame from the fans toward anyone but FOX, and that’s where I sorta feel sorry for them.

Where I do NOT feel sorry for FOX is that it chose to do this for a show that deserves the plug, from a quality standpoint. T:TSCC and Firefly were good, quality shows, yet they were not chosen to be saved by the network. Now that we have a quality and ratings stinker, FOX decides to let it hang on a bit longer. I sort of wonder if the network is doing this so it can point back and say to us all, “See?! We did throw you guys a bone once, but it didn’t matter — the show still tanked. So Sit Down, Shut Up… SaturdayNightsAtMidnightEasternStandardTimeCheckLocalListings.”

So, to you FOX: thanks for giving the Dollhouse fans more episodes to watch, but next time think about doing it for a show that deserves it at the time you plant the CANCELED stamp on the renewal forms.

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I remember many years ago that, when a guest was scheduled to appear on SNL, it was a near certainty that at least one skit would be all about some movie or TV show that the guest was associated with. What the hell happened to that? I miss those days of SNL. I think we all do.

Cool thing about this week’s post: ALL of the skits AND musical numbers are embedded below!

Cold Open: Presidential Address — Surprise! Another presidential address, and I think everyone was with me in knowing it just had to be about Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize … for “not being George Bush.” Yowch. Really a weak open, just because it short on the funny and really didn’t have much to it.

Monologue: Drew Barrymore — I had no idea Drew had hosted so many times (six) before. As she said, it’s the most any other female has hosted the show. I always love when a celebrity makes fun of themselves, but maybe this one went on for a bit too long.

Gilly — Anyone else done with this skit? I’m not sure there’s any way to make it funny. I especially can’t stand that it has a frick’n theme song. A theme song! As if this was supposed to be a separate TV show people would actually tune in to. “It’s Pat!” was at least funny a lot of the time. Gilly/Gigli was never funny, was it? At least throw it into the last half hour, not this early!

Celebrity Ghost Stories — This is a real show! I haven’t watched it before, but yeah, BIO has this show. Justin Long was a surprise cameo and did a great Matthew McConaughey. The best part of the skit was the beginning quote: “Welcome to the Biography Channel. Hey, I know it’s not my place, but … open the blinds.”

Commercial: University of Westfield Online — Y’know, I’d been wondering if having an online degree would actually work against a person when they try to get a job. Do hiring managers throw those resumes right in the trash, before going another word further into it? Now, if they could teach the fine skills that U. Westfield is teaching, graduates wouldn’t have to worry. Really liked this skit. The vague mumbling of the university’s name reminded me of a bunch of skits Chevy Chase had done. Remember “Land Shark?”

La Rivista Della Televisione con Vinny Vedecci — I loved that Vinny’s list of staff conquests included numbering them all (87 in all). Other than that, at this point of the night I was wondering if it was a bad idea to have stayed up to watch the whole thing. It usually only gets worse as the night goes on, right? Well, after Weekend Update, that is.

Musical Guest: Regina Spektor — I honestly have never heard of Ms. Spektor before. Pretty good coffee shop music and she’s decent on the piano, but there were some vocal notes I didn’t dig so much in the first number.

Weekend Update — Bill Hader’s James Carville was the highlight of the Update tonight. If you’ve ever seen this guy on TV before, Hader was dead on with his mannerisms and attitude.

Tampax to the Max Tournament of Champions — Funniest part of this bit was all of the Tampax slogans that “Pete Twinkle” kept coming up with. Favorite one: “Tampax. Helping you relax when Mother Nature attacks your slacks.” I even think I saw a bit of a smirk come out of Sudeikis on that one. But yeah, the skits aren’t improving after this.

Cooking al Fresco with Fran & Phil — What do you get when the city birds get picky with just breadcrumbs? Foodie birds! The Guy Fieri impression was the best part of this skit. It really had a lot of promise but, for some reason, it didn’t fully deliver. I think I expected a more outlandish reaction out of Samberg when the birds attacked, for example.

Larry King Live — Wieners! Did anyone else think for a second that, at some point, the joke of this skit would be about “wieners” being something other than a penis? No? Well then you can a penis a wiener way too often.

SNL Digital Short: Brenda & Shawn — Proven again that SNL can’t produce two cult favorite shorts two weeks in a row. I thought the poor film quality was great and they somehow were able to make the whole thing appear as though it was a locally broadcast cheap commercial. Other than that, I was wondering where the hell you get those glowing thumbs.

Hamilton — The best part of this skit was finding out the author had just finished reading her entire book to the people in the store. Oh, and Drew going full-out spread-eagle for Hamilton, with two book fans helping to keep her steady.

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Saturday Night Live seems to go through many up and down cycles. Heck, even from episode to episode the quality of the show can vary greatly. Through it all, though, one thing has remained constant: SNL has always satirized and mocked the politicians and current events of the day. The program has hysterically lampooned just about every politician who has found him/herself on the front page of the papers. Some say that Tina Fey’s scathing impersonations played a big part in the downfall of the McCain/Palin campaign. I’m not sure if that’s actually true, but it brings up the question: Is SNL the most important political show on television?

It seems like a completely ridiculous question, right? I never even would have considered the question, if I hadn’t seen this commentary article on CNN. It really got me thinking about the power that SNL has when it parodies politicians. Ed Rollins framed his article around the cold open of this past week’s episode which featured Fred Armisen doing a particularly weak Barack Obama impression, talking about all the things that Obama has not completed yet in his term. The video in question is embedded below. Rollins wonders if the skit is going to start a rash of criticism toward the president.

Rollins believes that the Palin skits from a year ago did play a role in the election. He also brings up Dana Carvey’s George H. W. Bush and Chevy Chase’s Gerald Ford as lasting impressions that have overtaken the actual images of the former presidents. It’s hard to argue with that. Practically all of my memories of the first President Bush involve something that SNL made fun of back in the day.

I found the article interesting and wonder just how powerful satire and humor can be. There are certainly a lot of serious political shows on television, especially in this day and age of 24 hour “news” channels. They just don’t seem to have the same impact that SNL has, though. When SNL comes out with a great political sketch it is instant water cooler talk, becoming a point of discussion on all of those news networks. Maybe there’s something to it. Perhaps a good skewering at the hands of a bunch of comedians can be a whole lot more damaging than anything any of those talking heads can spout.

What do you think? Is SNL the most important political show on TV?

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The attendance for these chats have been hit or miss, so we’d like to get some feedback from you, the readers, as to what shows you’d like to see us post chats for. We can’t promise anything, but it helps us figure out where to concentrate our energies.

Here’s a list of some of the more popular shows on TV this fall and those we’d be able to cover, if there was interest. Vote on those you would most likely attend, not those you’d just like us to post. Also, let us know in the comments if there’s a show we’re missing or anything else you have to add about the chats. Your feedback is much appreciated!

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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Tonight I was surprised not more was done with the Polanski case, but Weekend Update took it on a bit. For some reason, though, the doors to the SNL studio flew open for a few notable cameos, one of which will likely have people talking.

We’ll update the below with video clips of the skits from NBC.com sometime Sunday morning, when they’re released to the public. Until then, here’s a rundown on the skits and what I thought of them all.

Cold Open: Presidential Address — I knew the Olympics decision would make its way into the night’s episode somehow. How many Chicagoans now want that 2016 t-shirt he held up? Anyway, this wasn’t all that funny but maybe those who really despise Obama loved it more than words can say.

Monologue: Ryan Reynolds — I really like Ryan Reynolds, but this was definitely not a memorable monologue for the show. Best quote, regarding his starring in the Green Lantern movie: “We start filming soon, so look for that in 2053.”

Commercial: Mostly Garbage Dog Food — Wow, did this one hit home here, because we spent an unholy amount of time, money and sanity to feed our dog an all organic mix of raw meat and veggies that would infuriate the hungry. Why do all of this, when a dog would just eat crap right out of a garbage bin? Pretty funny commercial.

Celebrity Family Feud — In case you have no idea who the other family was playing against the Osmonds, that would be the Phillips family, also known as The Mamas & The Papas. Yeah, I know of them, but not enough to have totally gotten the creepy jokes. Was just OK — they could have gotten better families, no? (Update: After catching up on the week’s news, yeah this is timely and works perfect. Creepy!)

SNL Digital Short: I Threw It On The Ground — Did you catch the Elijah Wood cameo, while he was shoving a taser in Samberg’s ass with Ryan Reynolds? For all the WTF digital shorts over the past couple of seasons, this was one of the better ones. I thought about writing up the lyrics for y’all, but I thought better of it. (Update: Screw it, I wrote up the lyrics for you.)

Porcelain Fountains –I really have nothing to say about this skit. It was just one of those weird ones thrown in that I had hoped would have that “Sofa King” funniness to it, but it had none of that. Scarlett Johansson’s cameo was the only thing that made it remarkable.

Deep House Dish — Daymn, they were really messing with Samberg’s hair tonight. The Danny McCooz song basically making fun of Facebook status updates was … oh who are we kidding, it was all about seeing Lady Gaga and Madonna’s asses, then them getting in a cat fight, am I right? Actually, Samberg taking a jump in there was damn funny. That’s three cameos for the night, so far!

Weekend Update — Was it just me or did the Weekend Update seem especially long this week? I think the Schwarzenegger segment got the most laughs because of his authentic gapped teeth over how well he was impersonated. I’ve seen Hammond do better (that’s four!) Loved the Eeyore joke and the dig at Entourage’s Turtle in a couple of other segments.

Musical Guest: Lady Gaga — What was with the dude basically humping Lady (or is it Ms. Gaga?) and gyrating behind her throughout the first song? Not my kind of music, so I can’t really comment on her anymore than saying she has a nice voice based on her solo number at the piano. Anyone else think she looked like she was being sentenced to the Phantom Zone by Kryptonians in that getup in the second number?

So You Committed A Crime & You Think You Can Dance — What a dig at K-Fed’s failing physique. The recorded rehearsals were the best part of this skit, especially Will Forte’s character. The cuffed convict trying to dance and the one gnawing on Reynolds’s hand like a soup bone got a quick laugh out of me too.

International Masterworks — I loved the swipe at foreign programming overcompensating when trying to imitate an American accent along with the culture. “Hard to believe these actors are from Oslo and have never been to America.” Wasn’t awful, wasn’t fantastic.

Bubble Outfits — I always love when a celebrity figure can make fun of themselves. In this case, Lady Gaga one-upped her outfit from her Phantom Zone one, and in record costume-changing time! Squeezed this skit in, right under the wire.

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Sadly, we come to the end of our week highlighting The West Wing. And while we could write hundreds of additional articles on CJ’s wardrobe, and the many biblical references spouted by Jed Bartlet, we need to move on to other matters of television importance.

However, as we leave you with one last look at the series, and probably one of the most important turning points, we want to know what you thought of this little experiment. Did it keep your interest? Or did you really not give two poops about it? If you did enjoy it, then the next logical question is: would you want us to do it again?

Not another West Wing week … though we could do that again. Rather, a week highlighting another favorite series. And, if that’s the case, how frequently would you want to see it? Monthly? Quarterly? Annually? Do you have a show in mind? Let us know in the poll below and in your comments.

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Last night’s Entourage had one bit of big news for us, and it all focused in on one Ari Gold, his future, and the future of his agency. Once again, Vince took a very far back seat in this episode, only showing how much the boys rely so much on him and keep his cellphone ringing constantly with pleas for advice. Oh, and that he gets to screw chicks in his pool all day long. Often.

Terrence’s offer is potentially big news for how the rest of Ari’s career plays out on this show. There are two ways I can see this playing out, both of which could change the direction of the show in a positive way.

First, let’s assume Ari takes Terrence up on the newly negotiated price of buyout. Like he said to his colleagues, this would open up the agency to all kinds of other talent besides actors: sports, music and more. Not to mention that he’d have control of “the largest talent agency in the world.” This would likely open up a whole slew of possibilities for guest-starring appearances on the show, not to say that there already hasn’t been appearances by sports and music personalities on the show before. And then there are the possibilities for what it might open up for the boys, though I’m not quite sure what that might be just yet.

Secondly — and the most likely scenario to come from this, as I see it — Ari will suffocate under the weight of his newly formed empire and need to find a way to step away from it, permanently. This does not mean he’d leave the show or go into retirement, or at least not for good. With such a large agency to run, we could see Ari lose focus from the guys we’ve seen him “grow up” with. He’d be so far up the rungs of the ladder that to see him hanging with Vince and the boys would look pretty ridiculous. You don’t see the head of the biggest agency in the world hanging around with so-so actor Vincent Chase and his troupe of clingers-on — it’d make his agency look like a joke, no matter how large it may be. The covers of the DVDs, with Ari walking in-step with the boys would make no sense at all!

Somehow, Ari won’t be with this huge agency for long. He’ll either be ousted by his partners or, because of losing focus on his family and the friends he’s come to follow all these years, he’ll step back and run a small, private firm and just represent Vince and a few others. Who knows, maybe that small firm will be Gold/Murphy/Lee (Lee would be Lloyd’s last name).

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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(Season Two, Episodes Twenty One – Twenty Four)

I’m a bit of a finale whore. I tend to watch series finales of shows that I’ve never much cared for just because I want to be in on the hype, but it doesn’t stop there. As much as I hate cliffhangers, I do like how good series really take the opportunity to slowly build the tension up in the final couple of episodes of a season (Joss Whedon and Aaron Sorkin, two of my favorites in general, really stand out in this regard). In this group of episodes, however, I didn’t feel any of that.

Sure, we began to learn about Cuddy’s desire to have a child, and the lengths she’s willing to go to in order to get there. But in the last episode, the thread was dropped. Granted, there was House’s increased drug dependency, but really, it wasn’t layered in nearly as well as it could have been. Other than the immediacy of the shooting, it really didn’t feel like things were coming to an end until the final scene of the finale episode.

“Euphoria – Part Two”

It’s kinda sad, actually, but at this point, I’m not pulling for Foreman to make it. I know he does, and that probably factors into how I feel about everything, but still, I’m sitting in the bleachers shouting “Go Disease!” It finally took the brilliance that is Charles Dutton, and some mighty damn fine acting by Omar Epps, to turn me around.

House watching the Steve-Cam while in the clinic gave me the giggles, but then House with the penlight in the girl’s face had me laughing out loud. So often, it’s the little things in life.

Asking Cameron to be his medical proxy came way out of left field, especially as it followed House’s conversation with his dad. Him quoting her article was probably a bit more manipulation that I could have done without.

“Forever”

Those that know me in real life know that I have this great big huge irrational fear of drowning. Scariest movie I’ve ever seen? Titanic. True story. Probably why I was a lifeguard at age fifteen. All that back-story goes just to explain how difficult the teaser was to watch the minute I realized the baby was going to be under the water.

As I watched guest star Kip Pardue, I’m not so excited to say that my first thought was how much a better Chase he would be than Jesse Spencer. I’m just not a big fan, though I’m not sure if it’s just the way the character is written.

Pretty heartbreaking case of the week. I’ve never gone through the joy that is parenthood, but I do understand that it can also be quite a challenge. Misunderstanding postpartum depression for the deeper disease it actually was, well, it just kinda sucks (yeah, sure, gross understatement of the year, but nothing really covers it). The horror that this character experienced, and the conflicting emotions of her husband, were pretty well performed by both Pardue and Hillary Tuck.

(Hey!  Hillary Tuck was the Computer Tech who randomly kissed Charlie Crews in the two-part finale of season one of Life.)

“Who’s Your Daddy?”

Seriously, I know I say this each week, but its a testament to the incredible casting director that House, MD has — those folks are, according to IMDb, Amy Lippens and Stephanie Laffin, and are hopefully the best paid casting directors in all of television. D.B. “Toepick” Sweeney (not to be confused with another favorite of mine, Moira “Toepick” Kelly), is an actor that I’d love to see on TV every week.

The idea, however, that House had more than one friend (Wilson) is a bit odd, when you think about it. We’ve had this idea of a character who can seemingly only place his trust (what little he’ll dole out, that is) in one person at a time.

Okay, House diagnosing his patient by listening to a CD of her grandfather playing piano, now that’s pretty damn cool.

I do apologize for this week’s picture. Except, deep down, really, I don’t. I hope that doesn’t make me a horrible person.

“No Reason”

Great teaser. Seriously. The stuff with the clinic patient was funny, but then the shooter (Casey Jones, for those that are allowing me continued 90’s movie references) came out of nowhere. In fact, the whole episode was hilarious, especially Wilson, and then Chase doing House’s rehab for him.

I’m not one that’s normally grossed out, at least by anything on TV, but tonight was an exception. The event that occurred after the team was unable to relieve the ocular pressure quickly enough was a bit much (because, really, still too close to even type what it actually was).

House’s problem with telling what’s real and what’s not is ironically my problem with telling what was real and not. I’m a big fan of non-linear and non-traditional story telling, so I enjoyed the confusion, because I think it was supposed to be confusing.

I think House got a little bit of his own medicine with Wilson and Cuddy’s decision to try the experiential procedure (you know, in fantasy land). He’s shown time and time again that he’ll do whatever he think is in the best interest of the patient. His being so disassociated from reality, for someone as analytical as he is, was interesting. Only he could think his way out of his own head. I’m sure, if I knew more about the future of House, I could speak to how it’s an interesting parallel to where things are now. But I don’t. So I won’t.

Continuation of the Virgin Diaries

As you might have read, we’re all kind of curious here at CliqueClack if we should be continuing with the Virgin Diaries now that the Fall Season is upon us. So, instead of trusting my opinion (because, really, who does? I’m a 30 year-old guy that stopped watching Gossip Girl just because the whole CliqueClack team was making fun of me), we’ve decided to put the question to our readership in the form of the poll below.

A little disclosure: Personally, I’m probably taking a break from the doctors at Princeton-Plainsboro for a while either way. The episodes are so stand-alone and formulaic that it’s a challenge to look at several episodes at once and talk interestingly (or at least the closest approximation to interesting I can manage) each week. Even when I start up again, I’m considering dumping season three and jumping right to four, with the influx of new characters.

Advice on my House posts, or our Virgin Diaries in general?

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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Let’s say you heard a rumor about Entourage, that Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven) is being written out of season seven (that’s next season) of the show. Just, you know, hypothetically. Pay no attention to the big storyline being set up for Ari in the season finale (I won’t spoil it for you here). As a watcher of Entourage, what would you think if that news were true?

My first reaction would be that HBO is out of their fucking minds. Without Piven, the show will go down faster than a ten-dollar whore on a Congressman. What the hell would they replace him with, more of the “boys?”

But then I got to wondering: what do most fans of Entourage think of Ari Gold? Are you watching the show and enjoying it as a whole, or are you thinking that a half-hour is not enough time to give us more of Ari and Lloyd? Would you give up on Entourage or, hell, even HBO entirely if Piven were given his walking papers? Or maybe you just hate Ari and think he takes away from the show; good riddance to him.

If you’d likely give up on Entourage without Ari present, what would it take for you to change your mind (you know, besides not getting rid of Ari in the first place)?

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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• Entourage – Matt Damon sucker punches Vince with a Bono conference call
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(Season 2, Episodes 25-28)

Not surprising that Donnell and Associates is beginning to take on a new look. I’m actually surprised that it took this long for the little cash and respect that they’ve earned to begin to transform the place. Did I expect it would involve reorganization? No — I just thought that they might move offices, or at least make theirs look more presentable. Will the new order change things at the down and dirty criminal defense firm? Only time, and speculation, will tell.

2.25 “Food Chains”

Let’s away with Ellenor first: her chimp case was another one of these ridiculous romps to get someone a bit of screen time, but I won’t lie and say that I wasn’t moved by just how much the ape reminded me of a child. I would never argue that you could have the same connection, or that apes and humans are on level playing-fields, but there is enough there for an emotional tug.

Second was the insurance scam that Rebecca happened into when she got into a car accident. I think the sting is a bit much, but Jimmy is great in his role as a shady lawyer — The Grunt strikes again — and Ellenor starting to date the crooked chiropractor was an inspired twist. This should be interesting.

The main theme this time, of course, was Lindsay’s equity demand. The inevitable infighting begins, and we learn that Ellenor has been interviewing for jobs — let her go! Not to mention that Lindsay inadvertently admitted her prior relationship with Bobby … not that there were many not in the know at this point.

So, Bobby makes it happen: the practice is to become a partnership, with a seniority sliding scale determining equity, Eugene at the top and Rebecca (sweet, but what?) at the bottom. And no Jimmy for another year. Back to that in a minute, but first — what exactly was Bobby fighting here? I think, more than money, he was bucking at the challenge to his leadership and management, two things that he sucks at. Wake up and smell the overdue bills, pal!

I was so excited when Jimmy pouted about getting cut out, talking about how he’s earned respect (maybe disre-), and telling Bobby that he was going to quit. How joyous I was … for a few minutes. Seems like he’ll be back.

2.26 “Axe Murderer”

I never had the desire to, but boy am I glad that I never tried Ally McBeal! Calista Flockhart and Gil Bellows guested in this cross-over episode, with the extent of her lawyering being making different faces in court. Plus, I can’t believe the stupidity of the murder trial that they brought to Bobby. And then questioning what he needs to do to get the job done? Go back to whatever co-ed bathrooms you came from. Daniel Dae Kim, as a testifying police officer, saved the guest cast on this one.

However, this was one of my “Wow!” moments, when Dr. Peters (Kelly Connell) stood up in court and shot himself in the head. David E. Kelley has finally starting showing me a little bit of his Boston Legal magic, pushing the limits of what we can expect from television. I knew I was right to stick this out.

Meanwhile, Ellenor finds out that her boyfriend is the shady doc in Rebecca’s sting, and Lindsay takes it upon herself to offer Helen not only a job, but also equity, at Donnell and Associates (now a much longer name that I won’t bother to learn). The only things that Helen will bring with her is tension, and change — we don’t need either.

2.27 “Duty Bound”

Jimmy might die! I know, I’m a terrible person, but when he got shot and the doctor said it didn’t look good, I got so excited that I started to cheer for his death. Obviously, that wasn’t going to happen, but I managed to keep myself mixed up in the euphoria for most of the episode. Then he woke up — Bobby had told him that “if you could try to wake up, it would be best” — and the bubble burst. But it was nice while it lasted.

Another great guest in Christian Clemenson, but his character sucked. Jerry Espenson as a psychopathic murderer? Nah. Dann Florek, from Law & Order: SVU, played the priest who’s framed for the murder, due to the sanctity of the confessional seal. I have no interest in getting into religion; I just think that this topic has been over-played on TV. Yes, this episode aired eleven years ago, so maybe it wasn’t then, but we’ve all seen the priest who refuses to unseal the confessional, and the police/lawyers who can’t believe what he’s doing … it’s stale.

Lindsay starts a full-court press on Helen to come work with the firm, and Ellenor comes clean with her doc boyfriend about the sting operation. She likely will refuse to ever see this guy again, and she puts Rebecca and Jimmy in danger? And then defends the bum? Find her something real to do, or let her leave the show.

2.28 “Rhyme and Reason”

The opening of this episode, with the thirteen year-old shooting his mother, blew me away. And terrified me, because, can you even imagine?…

Helen and Bobby battle over how to try this kid, adult or minor, but I have to say: he committed a very adult crime. I think there’s no question here. So what if his life is over if he’s tried as an adult … isn’t his mother’s? And, do you really imagine that if he’s tried as a minor, his life wouldn’t be over anyway, after what he did?

Lindsay’s giving the office a face-lift, and faking it to land an asbestos class-action prosecution. I found it extremely distasteful that they’d pretend to be whatever, just to impress these people; if they, and their records, aren’t enough to land the case, the clients should not be reeled in by lies.

Eugene defends a murderer whose confession was attained through illegal methods. It’s a tough line to walk, defending the guilty over legal technicalities, but that’s what criminal defense attorneys do. I like that Eugene seems to believe in it, and I loved how he went off on the judicial panel when they denied his claim, even though they knew they were enforcing an illegal argument. We even got to hear why he became what he is, as he explains it to his son. But, did he really need to question what he does, yet again, in conversation with Bobby? It’s just such a tired, and lame, position for these attorneys to keep taking. If they’re really unhappy, then leave. If not, shut up about it already. It’s ruining a lot of really great plots.

With season two of The Practice drawing to a close, and the fall season about to explode onto our TVs, now’s the perfect opportunity to put a question to you: should I continue with my virgin diary now, or wait until the networks are on a break, and we could use a little relief from reruns and reality programming?

And, either way, a random question for you to ponder: why do they all address judges as “Judge?” Isn’t it “Your Honor?” Think on it….

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Don’t get me wrong — questions aplenty remain. But the finale provided us with more insight on Carter than we’ve ever had before.

The flip side is that the entire story was fairly predictable. My wife called the wrap-up mid-episode … I suppose we can’t have it all.

It was also somewhat disappointing that this was no long-haul of a case … I assumed that a season finale was the perfect place for a multi-part story. However, Dark Blue is still not renewed for a second season, so the writers were handcuffed into scripting something with an end to it. How could this fantastic show still be on the fence?

Dark Blue is such a sleeper that TNT is even doing a poor job promoting it. The show’s site is short on pictures and details, and heavy on incorrect information. Where’s the network support?

Anyway, to the episode: Carter is questioned in the murder of an undercover DEA agent that he had a prior relationship with. And current … the agent was engaged to Carter’s ex wife, Nicole. Or, we should say estranged wife, as Carter has yet to give her signed divorce papers, eighteen months on. Why’d they split? Carter’s take: “We had issues.”

Those issues appear to have at least partially stemmed from Carter’s two years undercover in East LA, living as Leo Clark, with a woman named Anna and her two small children. No one’s ever said that Carter doesn’t go all the way, but some things a marriage will not absorb.

I was a bit surprised that the team seemed to know Carter’s superior, Captain Maynard (Tyrees Allen). I’m not sure why, but I always got the impression that the wall was so high, they had no idea who he was, just that he existed. Although, if Dean processed that his title is “Captain,” he sure didn’t act like it.

Carter and team were questioned by DEA Agent Harris, a desk jockey assigned to wade head-first into the workings of undercover LAPD officers. The obvious disdain on both sides could have been avoided if the two law enforcement agencies had foreseen what television has taught us all: without a common frame-of-reference, the investigation was doomed from the start.

Ty shocked me when he appeared to bail on Carter. I’m not saying be comfortable with covering up the murder of a federal agent, but Ty went as far as to question what he owed Carter. That, coupled with his arc thus far, left me assuming that he’d go for the Major Crimes transfer.

Actually, I also thought that Carter would be suspended pending a full investigation, and that Jaimie, after sort of coming clean to Scott (Noah Bean), would be off with him to San Francisco, leaving Dean, in the final scene, trying to run solo undercover investigations.

You know, a full team split, ala the Leverage season one finale. And, particularly if the show isn’t coming back, it would have given us a reason for the non-return: no team to follow. Not to mention, if it does return, great drama as Carter tries to reassemble his people.

What the entire team returning to headquarters in the end did do was make a statement from the show — to TNT — that there’s still more to be done. So, how about it?

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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I’ve been mulling this post for a while, but all of this Defying Gravity business finally broke my indecisiveness. The good ole Cancellation Watch is one of my favorite fall pastimes. This year, there are some pretty good candidates. As you’ll see after the jump, a lot of the team are hating on the NBC medical shows I’m actually looking forward to. Sitcoms, too, seem to take a beating.

What do I think? I’m not seeing a big future for FOX’s Brothers … CCH Pounder, what were you thinking? If not Brothers, then I’m thinking The Forgotten. I just don’t think Slater’s late addition to the cast is going to be enough.

Keith: “I’m going with: Hank, Accidentally on Purpose, Mercy, or Trauma. Brothers is also a good bet. I’d narrow it down to Mercy or Trauma, seeing as they are on the same network and I just can’t imagine them both succeeding … can they?”

Deb: “Accidentally on Purpose is really, really bad, but will probably hang on a bit because of its time slot. I’m going with Mercy, although don’t overlook ABC because they have a reputation! Will Defying Gravity count, because it will probably be that.”

Rich: “I can see Mercy going because it’s such a fish out of water on NBC. I can’t remember the last time the network had a character-driven drama. Hank would be my second choice since traditional sitcoms no longer work on any networks other than CBS.”

Jason: “I think it looks grim for Hank and Accidentally on Purpose. Three Rivers perhaps. [A show about] Organ donors is a bit odd.”

Brett: “I wouldn’t give too much weight to the time slot for Accidentally On Purpose. For one, Jenna Elfman was gifted with the cushy CBS time slot before, with Courting Alex. How did that work out?  Furthermore, I think the CBS 8-9 hour is going to be down year to year, because How I Met Your Mother won’t be as strong at 8 as Big Bang Theory was. With House and DWTS in the mix, the best hope is for third in the hour. But if Heroes has anything at all left, it could at least knock AOP to 4th in the demo, if not overall. It’s not unheard of (Courting Alex, Out Of Practice) for CBS to drop the hammer quickly on Monday night. If it’s not canceled, perhaps shifted to Wednesday to burn off the ordered episodes with Gary or Christine filling it, or Rules making an early return.

That said, Trauma is my pick for first to be axed. Following Heroes hasn’t worked out well for anyone recently. Given the increased competition that Trauma faces, with DWTS, Lie To Me, Men/Big Bang, is there any reason to think it can do better than My Own Worst Enemy did?”

Julia: “I would just like to re-assert that all of y’all are cynics. I want to know what the sleeper smash hit will be (besides, obviously, Glee. That’s not exactly news). My guess is Modern Family.”

What do you think?

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

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(Buffy Season 4, Episodes 3-4)
(Angel Season 1, Episodes 3-4)

Now that’s a crossover between two shows. Brilliantly and seamlessly handled. This is why I chose to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel back-to-back like this. I knew Whedon had dropped little treats like this in for his loyal viewers, and now I can pretend to be one, too.

It was also nice to see the return of some familiar faces to both series. As I said last week, the casts are pretty lean. And while I can forgive it as we’re getting settled into our new environments on both shows, it’s time to start stretching out and meeting new people, as well as reconnecting with old friends.

B.4.3 – “The Harsh Light of Day”
(Original Air Date: October 19, 1999) A couple of welcome familiar faces turned up in Sunnydale with this episode. The more I see of Anya’s awkward attempts at humanity, the more I enjoy her continuing presence on the show. Her argument about human bodies with their interlocking parts was brilliant.

And then there’s Spike. How can you not love him? The only problem with Spike is that he’s never quite as bad-ass as he wants to be. Instead, he winds up Buffy’s punching bag as she works over her issues with another guy.

The situation with Parker was painfully common in college. My first college roommate was the Parker of our floor; only I was the one awkwardly in the room with them the next morning when he decided to just disappear. Of course, it would have to be Buffy that falls for the charm and has yet another horrible sexual experience. For a pretty girl she sure does get dumped on a lot … and dumped.

Nice set up, with the Gem of Amarra heading to LA with Oz so he can give it to Angel. Another reminder for the fans of Buffy to check out the spin-off, conveniently airing Oz’s arrival right after this one.

A.1.3 – “In the Dark”
(Original Air Date: October 19, 1999) Even better, Oz wasn’t alone in his trip to LA seeking the Gem. I loved the cold open with Spike giving voiceover to Angel’s chatting with the “damsel in distress” after his daring rescue.

Even though Spike’s continuing quest for the Gem is a serious matter, he always brings a bit of levity to any scene he’s in. While Whedon’s trademark humor is a part of Angel, it’s still a much darker show so far. So little moments like Spike’s hair catching on fire in his closing scene are priceless.

The whole sequence with Oz driving the van was reminiscent of the alternate future episode of Buffy where Buffy never came to Sunnydale. I was beginning to think his appearance at the beginning with the Gem was all we were going to get.

As a crossover, I think these two episodes worked together very well. Spike is frustrated again, and vows to work alone. After the annoying Harmony in Buffy and the overly ambitious Marcus here, it’s probably a good move.

As for Angel, I get the brooding thing, but destroying the Gem of Amara because he hadn’t “earned” it. That’s crap. Hide it again then and wait until you do earn it. It allows you to go out in the daytime. Someday that’ll be worth it. It’s not like there’s a cure for vampirism.

B.4.4 – “Fear, Itself”
(Original Air Date: October 26, 1999) I absolutely loved how the truly haunted house was used to explore the internal emotional issues within the cast. Willow is feeling pressure from the gang because she wants to go further into witchcraft, and they’re a bit more cautious about the real dangers. Xander is worried that he’s no longer a part of the group, and Oz fears the wolf-man. As usual.

Buffy is just a basket of fears; mostly the same ones she’s been harboring all series like never really accomplishing anything for all her fighting, and never being able to be a normal girl. Only now you can add in the fresh fear that she’ll never be good enough for anyone to love. All of that accomplished with scary monsters and shifting doors.

Loved Anya’s bunny costume, as well as her explanation that bunnies scare her. Even better was Giles. It’s getting more and more fun seeing him out of his librarian element. I was a bit put off, as Buffy was, by the obnoxious-ness of the sombrero, but I applauded his efforts to get into the spirit of the holiday.

A.1.4 – “I Fall to Pieces”
(Original Air Date: October 26, 1999) There’s a creepy monster-of-the-week for you. Angel’s like a poor man’s X-Files, isn’t he? Only more supernatural than government experiment-based. Still not sure how Dr. Falls Apart pulled off his particular abilities, but they were disturbing to behold.

The agency came together a little more officially, with Angel finally agreeing to charge customers. Who knew it would be Doyle to offer the rationale that would work: If they pay you they can move on and forget you as their “savior.” And it worked. And Cordy can have some money now.

There’s really not much more to say about it. Not a lot of density in the series or the development of the characters yet. Doyle’s place is almost as bad as Cordelia’s (I don’t care what she says, her place is horrific!). And Angel still has the best pity parties.

CALL FOR RESPONSES

With the new fall season upon us, we here at CliqueClack are looking at these “Virgin Diaries” with question marks in our eyes. Should we put them on hiatus until the winter break, or perhaps next summer? Should we continue as normal, or will things be too crowded with the fall slate unfolding at the same time?

So I’m throwing the question out to you: What are your thoughts about Virgin Diaries in the fall? Are you still inclined to follow along? Would you like a break from the action, and have us pick it up again when the land of television slows down again? Sound off below and let your voices be heard!

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As season five of Bones draws ever nearer (Thursday, September 17th, according to our 2009-10 calendar) there’s one primary question that needs to be answered: who will becomes Bones’ permanent assistant?

After Zack decided go nutso at the end of season three, Bones and the other Squints have had to deal with a small cadre of interns who have tried to live up to Mr. Addy’s qualifications (except the deranged killer thing). While there was no true front-runner at the end of season four, and it looks like season five will continue with the Intern-Go-Round, we can always speculate on who would be the best fit for Dr. Temperance Brennan.

Clark Edison — Clark has been around the longest — since the season three premiere. This gives him the advantage of working the most with the team. He has the knowledge, and, as Bones said when trying to make a final intern decision, he’s the most astute. The only problem with him is his social skills, which are this side of a brick. He refuses to take part in the informal conversations of the other Squints, making him either the strongest or weakest candidate.

Daisy Wick — Daisy is probably the least likely candidate to be made permanent. Her kiss-ass, idolizing attitude toward Dr. Brennan is very off-putting, causing her to be fired twice. Perhaps some influence by her boyfriend, Dr. Lance Sweets, can change the tide.

Vincent Nigel-Murray — My personal favorite to be picked. Deemed by Bones as the most intelligent, Vincent has the super ability of spewing out useless facts of information during murder investigations. Turns out, these nonsensical items are Vincent’s way of coping with the vast pressures of the job. These have been reduced as of late, making him a better intern. Plus, he has a British accent — always a plus.

Wendell Bray — Out of all the interns, Wendell is my least favorite. This is due to his, um, normalcy. Where the other interns have their share of quirks, Wendell is downright dull when working amongst Bones and the Squints. Granted, Temperance thinks he has potential, and Booth likes his normalcy. He may have an outside chance.

Colin Fisher — At first, Colin was my least favorite. His constant pessimism about his own skills and his drab life were more sad than funny. However, Mr. Fisher has grown on me and I’ve enjoyed his other appearances. That doesn’t mean that he’s at the top of my list; yet, I would probably pick Wendell over Colin.

And now, the underdogs…

Scott Starret – You might not remember Scott as he was an early intern in the rotation. Played by Michael Badalucco, Scott was the best intern and should have been considered right there and then as Zack’s permanent replacement. Obviously, the producers of Bones went the whole ‘Round Robin Intern’ concept, which took Scott out of the running. However, should they ever decide to end that concept, and Badalucco is available, well….

Zack Addy — I know there are many fans of the young Dr. Addy out there, and they won’t like the statement that Zack shouldn’t return as Bones’ assistant. By the time he went to the Other Side, Zack was even more Spock-like than Temperance is on a normal day. The Squints need someone to balance Dr. Brennan’s anal-retentativeness; Zack is not that person.

So, what do you folks think? Who should become Bones’ new intern?

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Ten years later ABC is bringing back the show (including host Regis Philbin) for a two week event. Does anyone care?

Now, I was a Millionaire fan back in 1999. As a huge trivia nerd, I thought it was pretty awesome and used to watch it with my family. However, over time I grew annoyed with the small flaws in the show: the stupidly easy questions at the beginning, “final answer,” the faux-drama created through lights and music, and… Regis. God Bless him, even the Rege started to drive me nuts after a while. Long story short, my lifetime quota of Millionaire has been filled, and then some. Night after night of the show just wore me down and eventually, I wasn’t interested anymore, not in the least.

Now it’s ten years later and I still don’t want to watch Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. I can’t help wondering if I’m alone here. Is there anyone really excited about this? I mean, if you were some kind of superfan you could have been watching the show in syndication, or maybe just bought yourself a copy of Slumdog Millionaire and watched it over and over again.

So what do you think, are you excited for more Millionaire, or are you like me and you just don’t care?

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