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Five old TV commercials which creep me out

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Now, there have been a lot of bad television commercials and horrid ad campaigns over the years. Right now in my area there’s a commercial for Friendly’s restaurants that I hate with a passion enough to make me vow to never step foot in the chain again. Of course, I don’t think there are any near me and I haven’t seen one since circa 1993 or so, but that’s beside the point. But I’m talking really old classic TV commercials here and not ones that are just annoying. I’m talking creeping me out. Read on past the jump where I expose my phobias and five old TV commercials.

This first one is wrong on so many levels. Yeah, it was a different world back then. But to have the beloved cartoon characters smoking? I realize that Winston tastes good like a cigarette should, but we’re talking Fred and Barney here. Not to mention the obvious sexism in the commercial. Why are Wilma and Betty busting their butts while Fred and Barney goof off? It’s before my time, but I can only think it might have aired during the cartoon. Yikes!

Then we’re talking an evil giant looming over a town much like Godzilla attacking New York City. Although the commercial I’m posting here was before my time, those Green Giant commercials scared me when I was a child. I kept thinking he was going to tear down my swingset for some odd reason. Hey, I was a kid. All the Green Giant had to do was step on it and my backyard fun would be history!

You’re all aware that Michael Jackson was once a cute little black kid who performed with his brothers in The Jackson Five, right? I’m listing this commercial not for its own inherent creepiness, but thinking to the future and what would become of Michael. It’s enough to creep me out, for sure.

Chatty Cathy is Talky Tina as far as I’m concerned. I owned a Chatty Cathy as a very young child. I also saw Talky Tina kill Telly Savalas on an episode of the original Twilight Zone. I had nightmares for months. I was nice to all of my dolls, but you never know. I could just look at one wrong and she’d want to kill me! Watch Chatty Cathy’s eyes in the commercial. Evil, I tell you. Scary creepy evil — a child shouldn’t have the burden to bear witness.

This last one is right in there with the Jolly Green Giant as far as I’m concerned. Yeah, it’s that humongous Kool-Aid pitcher destroying property. You know, I think it could be a pedophile. I don’t like how it’s attracted to young kids.

I know some TV commercials, old or new, must creep you out. I can’t be the only one, right? C’mon … share your tales of horror. If you don’t, I’ll just have to think your dolls killed you.

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11 Responses to “Five old TV commercials which creep me out”

October 4, 2008 at 8:53 PM

HA! I love the Kool Aid dude. I always had a wish that the bastard would break through my kitchen wall. Love the odes to the man on Robot Chicken. And Smokey the Bear, too.

I can’t say that any commercials ever scared me. Or, if they did, I must have tuned them out. As it is, I love watching old commercials. Kind of like perusing the old Christmas issues of the Sears catalog. Only good memories!

October 4, 2008 at 9:43 PM

Don’t you put it in your mouth
Don’t you put it in your mouth
Don’t you stuff it in your face
Don’t you stuff it in your face

October 4, 2008 at 9:56 PM

Don’t let Bob see that list.

I mean seriously :-)

If that Flintstones Commercial is wrong on oh so many levels then I don’t want to sit next to you watching an episode of “Mad Men”

October 4, 2008 at 10:18 PM

That clip of the first McD’s commercial. Anybody notice the clown was Willard Scott of The Today Show? (Or one of those early am news shows). It is a creepy commercial, but then, he’s still pretty creepy. At least Smucker’s and all the hundred-year-olds still love him.

October 4, 2008 at 10:29 PM

They might as well have used Pennywise the clown from Stephen King’s IT for that McDonalds commercial.

October 5, 2008 at 1:06 AM

Trust me there are many many reason why you shouldn’t ever eat in a Friendly’s Ice Cream Restaurant, an ad isn’t even close to the list.

October 5, 2008 at 1:16 AM

Oreo – You have a point there. Great, now I’m going to have nightmares about Friendly Franks.

October 5, 2008 at 8:26 AM

I had a Chatty Cathy doll too!(I think we’re showing our age Jackie!)

Also, I was in a restaurant not long ago with my kids and the tv’s at the bar were showing a baseball game all except one (which I had my back to) – it was showing a “Chucky” movie. Finally my daughter said “Mom – Why is that doll killing people?!”. I still get to hear about that from time to time.

There was a tobacco commercial I remember that used to bother me. For some reason, it featured a dog with a black circle drawn around one eye. I always felt sorry for the dog.

October 5, 2008 at 5:26 PM

Methinks Willard Scott may have been Stephen Kings inspiration for Pennywise in IT.

October 6, 2008 at 11:13 AM

I don’t recall being afraid of commercials as a child but now as a full grown adult there are plenty of commercials that creep me out. The ‘Burger King’ guy gives me nightmares. And these commercials that tend to use bugs in their advertising – they freak me out – I can’t change the channel fast enough.

October 7, 2008 at 12:24 PM

LOL, not that you’re gonna run right out there after reading this, but Jackie, I think there’s a Friendly’s on Rt 22 in Bridgewater across from the Commons Mall. Also there’s definitely a Friendly’s on Stelton Rd in South Plainfield, right next to the Fountainbleu Diner.

I haven’t been to either in years, and when I did go, it was only for ice cream. Millions of better places to eat that Friendly’s.

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